Surprise!
by Cheerful Regression
Summary: Shikamaru returned home from his mission wanting nothing more than to be greeted by a sweet, loving girlfriend and to take a nap. But Ino is over at Sakura's house, crying her eyes out. Hey, guess what? Itty bitty family-type surprise. ShikaIno.
1. Two Little Words and One Big Word

**Summary: **Shikamaru returned home from his mission wanting nothing more than to be greeted by a sweet, loving girlfriend and to take a (richly deserved) nap. But, as it turns out, Ino is over at Sakura's house, crying her eyes out. Hey, guess what? ShikaIno.

**Pairings: ShikaIno **(predominantly), and **SakuLee **(a pet pairing).

If you don't like these pairings then you'd be something of an idiot if you read this anyway. If you want to flame then I'll go ahead and copy/paste this warning in reply. Please don't be silly.

**Unbeta'd.**

**Dedication:** Me. It's my birthday, and I'm gonna post what I want.

**Disclaimer**: Oh good heavens, if only I owned it. Then I could fix certain things...

* * *

**Surprise!**

* * *

**Chapter One: **

**Two Little Words and One Long One.**

Even with all of his intelligence, Shikamaru hadn't been able to figure it out.

He'd gotten back and Ino hadn't been there. He'd thought it normal enough, even if he did feel somewhat disgruntled. He'd been away on a three-day mission and when he returned she wasn't even going to be around to say hello? What was the entire point of everything?

As it turned out Ino was over at Sakura's house.

And during that time Ino was lamenting grievously for reasons she 'could not explain.' But when she kept wailing at about how it must have been so nice to have such a wonderfully carefree and innocent relationship with Lee, Sakura got a bit confused and started to believe that Ino was completely misunderstanding things. She informed Ino (in an astonishingly blunt fashion) that she and Lee _were_ having sex. And there was nothing wrong with a committed, sexual relationship.

Ino stared at her with red-rimmed eyes. "What?" she exclaimed, "Not my poor little Sakura…"

Sakura's eyes widened for a moment. "Ino, don't you _dare_ tell me that you've got a crush on me. I won't believe you at all."

"No! I don't love you!" Ino said, and rubbed her itchy eyes with her fists.

"What's going on then?" Sakura asked. There was no answer. Sakura tried again. "Who _do_ you love? And I'll tell you now, there's only one answer that I won't not beat you up for."

Ino started crying with renewed vigor. "Ino!" Sakura said harshly, "You tell me right now that you love Shikamaru or else I will beat the hell out of you! Don't think that I won't!"

Ino was crying too hard to answer. Sakura glared at her. "You commitment-phobe! Don't you dare do anything stupid! You two are perfect together and you're not allowed to break-up!"

"That's not the problem," Ino managed between her heavy cries.

Sakura felt no relief. "What is the problem?" she demanded.

"I'm ruining his life!" Ino finally managed, sobbing hardcore in Sakura's shoulder.

Sakura paused. "_What_?"

Ino shook her head, refusing to go any further. Sakura felt truly confused. Was her friend finally showing some signs of poor confidence? … _Why_?

She decided to proceed with caution. "He considers himself lucky to have you," she said.

Ino broke into even _worse_ crying, which Sakura hadn't thought possible and Sakura knew a lot about crying. "You're making me feel like the worst person in the world!" Ino wailed.

There was a knock at the door and then the soft voice of Sakura's mother came through. "Sakura? Ino? Is everything alright in there?"

Sakura shot Ino a meaningful look while answering, "Yeah, we're fine. Sorry for bugging you!"

Ino gulped inwards a few times. "Yeah," she began, but then broke into tears again.

Sakura's mother opened the door and gazed down at the girls in concern. "What's going on?" she asked.

"Nothing-" Sakura began.

"I'm sorry Mrs. Haruno," Ino sobbed, "I'll leave now."

"Whoa, whoa, whoa," Sakura's mother said, catching Ino by the shoulders as she started to walk by. "What is going on here?"

"My life is a mess!" Ino wailed.

Sakura's mother looked at her for a moment, nodded in sudden understanding, and gave the girl a hug. "It'll work out in the end. Just go on home and face it," she said.

Ino nodded miserably and trailed away.

"Wait!" Sakura said, getting to her feet but finding herself ultimately blocked by her own mother. "Mom!" she exclaimed after the front door shut, "Why are you sending her home?"

Her mother didn't seem to be paying too much attention to her. "Her parents are going to kill her," she murmured to herself.

"_What_?" Sakura said. "What the heck is going on?"

Her mother shook her head. "You'll find out soon enough."

"Tell me now," Sakura said, "Since you stopped Ino from telling me."

She shook her head again. "You, my darling daughter, love to chat too much. You'll find out soon enough."

* * *

Shikamaru woke up from after-mission-nap at about eleven that night in order to forage for some food before being able to return to sleep. It surprised him to see Ino already in the kitchen, one arm cradling her head as she lay with her cheek flat against the table.

"You're back," he said.

"Hi," she said in return, nodding. Though the nod was actually just her head shifting against the tabletop.

He waited a moment before allowing a bit of irritation to build. "Glad to see you missed me while I was gone."

Ino nodded again, slightly. Just the tiniest tilt. "Glad you're back," she mumbled.

Shikamaru let the silence wait for a moment. "I'm safe too," he finally said.

"Good," Ino said.

Shikamaru shifted slightly. "Fine. Goodnight."

He was about to walk away again when Ino made that noise that always preceded tears (with her, anyway), and he turned around in confusion. Ino was covering her face with her hands and she was actually crying.

"Are you… are you _crying_?" he said warily.

"Uh-huh," she said into her hands.

He waited a moment. "Why?"

"I'm a terrible, horrible person."

There was very sudden streak of terrifying cold ice that suddenly coated Shikamaru's spine and shoulders before he forced it away. After a very dark silence he said, "What does that mean?"

Ino choked and shook her head.

Shikamaru sighed silently. To himself. He truly hadn't thought that she'd ever cheat on him. She used to have a lot of… wild behaviors, but he thought that she'd really been… He let his hands fall and stuffed his hands into his pockets. He had thought that she loved him.

"What did you do?" he asked quietly.

Ino shook her head again, still choking on her tears.

He waited silently. She wasn't a coward. She'd tell him. At least she felt bad about it, though. Was it with someone he knew? God, he hoped not. He hoped that it was with some nothing little civilian that he could kick the crap out of. Maybe kill and make it look like an accident of sorts-

"It's your fault too-" Ino finally managed.

Shikamaru's eyes widened. "My fault?" he said coldly.

His mind was instantly racing with that one. How could that be his fault? He'd been a _damn_ good boyfriend lately. And attentive and… helpful. He wasn't doing anything wrong. There was no way that this was following one of those classic romance tales of an ignored lover driven into the arms of another. Bullshit.

"Uh-huh."

Ino didn't even do him the courtesy of looking up at him so that she could see his disgust.

"What exactly did I do?" he asked in an equally cold tone.

There was a bunch of sobbing that he couldn't understand, except for the very last sentence that finished with, "Daddy's going to kill me."

…

"_What_?" Shikamaru asked. "What does your father have to do with any of this?"

Ino cleared her throat loudly and she looked up at him, her large eyes red with a day's worth of crying. "I _said_, that he'll kill me for being pregnant."

Shikamaru blinked. Paused. And blinked again. "For… _what_?"

Ino buried her head in her arms again. "I'm pregnant," she said into the table, "Congratulations."

"You-" Shikamaru said, his normally sharp mind failing him. "You… oh shit."

Ino's crying strengthened.

It took another moment to regain a synchronization between his mouth and brain. "You're pregnant?"

She nodded. "Two months along."

"You're sure?"

"Four tests. All positive."

"Oh. You're _pregnant_?"

Wow. Life was going to be changing soon. Drastically. And Ino was right. Her father was going to kill the both of them.

She hadn't cheated on him though.

"Who else knows?"

"S-Sakura's m-m-m-mom," Ino managed through quavering lips.

"But not Sakura?" Shikamaru asked in confusion.

"No."

"Your mom?"

"Just S-Sakura's."

Speaking of mothers, his own mother was going to… Shikamaru shuddered and abandoned that particular train of thought. And then he really didn't know what to say.

"You could go get checked out," he said, "Sometimes those tests aren't accurate…"

Ino rolled her eyes. "Yeah. Inaccurate four times. Along with the fact that I just so happen to have missed two periods. Pure coincidence." The sharpness of her tone was hampered by cracking into yet more tears.

There was a moment of silence before Shikamaru spoke again, almost unable to keep from saying it. "Your dad is going to _kill_ me. Using torture."

Good god, the things that man had _said_ to him. Even though Inoichi _knew_ that Shikamaru and Ino were sleeping together, he'd still managed many different terrible and dark threats about mistreatment or 'misuse.'

"Don't talk about my dad," Ino demanded with less force than she had ever demanded of anything. "He's going to…"

Shikamaru really, honestly, did not know what to say. This was the last thing that he'd been expecting. He expected people to _die_ more than he expected _this_ to happen. He glanced over at Ino again and wondered exactly _how long_ she had been crying like this. It looked painful.

He got a glass of water, sat down across from and shoved the glass at her. "You're going to make yourself sick," he said.

Ino looked at the glass, rubbed one of her eyes and then burst into tears again. Shikamaru sighed, but it wasn't the 'how troublesome' or even the 'how tiresome' sigh that he usually gave. This was an entirely unusual circumstance. After several more moments he said, "Why are you crying?"

Ino dropped her hands and looked up at him abruptly. Her red eyes were going from miserable to incredulous and then, slowly but steadily, to angry. "Why am I _crying_?" she repeated hoarsely. "I'm _crying_ because you're the biggest jerk in the world!"

Shikamaru blinked.

Ino glared and rubbed at her eyes again. "I hate you! My father is going to kill us both, your mother is going to be mad at me, and my Mom is g-g-going to be so," Ino's face screwed up a bit, "_disappointed_. And you come home and act all mean and then ask me I'm _crying_?"

"I didn't act mean," Shikamaru said automatically.

"You did too! You acted like _I'd_ done something really wrong and-" Ino's expression suddenly darkened even as her face paled.

Shikamaru felt a slight flutter of panic. She'd figured out what he'd thought she had done. "You told me that you did something terrible, of course I wasn't happy-" he began, mounting a quick defense.

"You thought that I cheated on you?" Ino shrieked angrily, "So you think that this isn't even yours, huh?"

"Ino-"

"I bet when Sakura says she's done something bad, Lee doesn't think _she's_ out screwing half of Konoha!" Ino shouted, getting out of her chair and stalking furiously down the hallway, into their bedroom and slamming the door shut behind her.

There were several ways to respond to that one, most of which would warrant an almost-immediate death sentence from Ino.

"Lee and I do not think the same way," Shikamaru said through the door, raising his voice to be heard above Ino's renewed crying.

"Because Lee actually _loves_ Sakura," Ino immediately returned, "Which is something _you_ have no experience with!"

Shikamaru sighed. "You are being unreasonable."

"Then I guess you _were_ being reasonable? I'm just _that_ unfaithful? I've never cheated on you, and I could have, Shikamaru!" Ino shouted.

He felt that it was very unfortunate that they lived in apartment complex. There was no way that the neighbors weren't able to hear what was going on. And it was nearly midnight.

But honestly, what the hell was he supposed to say to that? And it didn't help that there was the slightest of sharp jabs of jealousy from that.

"Is that supposed to inspire confidence?" he said, "I bet Sakura doesn't see guys and tally them down as guys that she could sleep with if she _weren't_ with Lee."

Of all of the things to say, that certainly wasn't it.

Ino threw the door open so suddenly that even with his fast reflexes it almost hit him and then she was right up in his face. "That's what you think I do? That I sit around thinking about how I wished we weren't going out so that I could sleep with whoever?"

"No-"

"Like I'm forced to stay here! I could leave any time I want, I've got plenty of places I can go!" Ino shrieked.

Shikamaru was feeling the edges of his temper rising. He suppressed it. "Ino what the hell would you think if I told you that I'd done something terrible?"

Ino's eyes widened then narrowed. "I'd think a million different things! I'd think that maybe someone got killed on the last mission, or you insulted my Dad to his face, or you burned down the apartment! You could screw up in a lot of different ways!"

"How the _hell_ could I burn down the apartment?" Shikamaru asked.

"And now you think I'm stupid as well!" Ino returned, and she moved back and slammed the door shut. "Sleep on the couch or leave or do whatever the hell you want! I don't care!"

Neither of them said anything. Shikamaru waited until he heard Ino walk away from the door and move onto the bed before he sighed and headed out to the couch. Seventy-two hours away and this was _not_ what he had been looking forward to. And it didn't help that Ino was still crying so loudly that he could hear her all the way to the living room.

_Pregnant_? Wow.

He was only very barely asleep when he felt Ino sit on the edge of the couch next to him and then a half-second pause before she laid her head down on his chest and both hands gripped his shoulders. It was entirely dark, almost three in the morning, and even his eyes couldn't fully adjust to the darkness.

"I wouldn't cheat on you," Ino murmured in an almost pouty tone into his skin

"Yeah," he said back.

"Why would you think I would?" Ino continued in that same hurt voice.

"Because that's the intro for that particular conversation."

"That doesn't mean I cheated on you."

He sighed, knowing that he couldn't edge around the issue, no matter how much worse it could possibly make her ego, "It's one of the hazards of dating an extremely attractive girl."

"You get jealous?" Ino said and, to Shikamaru's exasperation, there was a hint of a pleased note in her voice.

He knew that this was acceptable in lieu of a verbal apology. Then he could feel Ino suddenly sink onto him further and the mood was abruptly morose. "I won't be pretty much longer," she said and her voice was tilting towards tears again. "I'm going to get big and fat and ugly."

Shikamaru moved slightly to the side and yanked her closer against his side and tucked his arm around her. "No you're not."

"Yes I am," Ino said with a sniff and pressed harder against him. "I'm going to g-get _huge_."

"No. You are eventually… going to… get to buy new clothes," he said.

"No _pretty_ clothes."

He reached around her and took her hand, gently intertwining their fingers. "You'll make them pretty."

Ino sniffed, but moved their hands up and she lightly kissed his wrist. "I wish I weren't pregnant."

He pressed his lips to the back of her shoulder. "Hey, at least it's mine," he said.

Ino stiffened in his arms and then she loosened and there was the shortest choke of a laugh. He waited to hear the final verdict. Ino turned and gently kissed his lips and then she rested her forehead against his. "I guess that's sort of a plus," she whispered.

He smiled in the dark and ran his hands along the contour of her back and shoulders. "I guess so. Out of the alternatives."

"I could list them for you if you'd like," Ino murmured, "You smug, little bastard."

His smile turned into a grin and they somehow moved so that she was beneath him and he was able to leisurely kiss her temple. "You can list who you want, but it really doesn't matter at this point," he said.

"Don't think for a second that I still couldn't leave you," Ino said and her whisper didn't sound as enthralled.

"Don't," he whispered softly in return.

Ino went still for half a moment and then she pulled him into a much longer kiss. "Fine," she whispered and it would have been harder for the two to be speaking more intimately if they tried.

* * *

**A/N.**

**Hey, and here we have yet _another_ multi-chapter fic that I'm going to have to work on updating. However, luckily, for this one, it is quite simple and I have most of it written.**

**Anyway, like I said, this is dedicated to me in honor of my birthday. I'm working on various other updates, so keep an eye out (if that's your kinda thing). **

**Fun Fact. I'm posting this at my place of employment. So technically, I am being paid for my fanfiction. **

**I will consider a review to be the equivalent of a birthday present. Late gifts are also perfectly acceptable. :D  
**

**-CR  
**


	2. The Speed of Bad News

**Summary: **Shikamaru returned home from his mission wanting nothing more than to be greeted by a sweet, loving girlfriend and to take a (richly deserved) nap. But, as it turns out, Ino is over at Sakura's house, crying her eyes out. Hey, guess what? ShikaIno.

**Pairings: ShikaIno **(predominantly), and **SakuLee **(a pet pairing).

If you don't like these pairings then you'd be something of an idiot if you read this anyway. If you want to flame then I'll go ahead and copy/paste this warning in reply. Please don't be silly.

**Unbeta'd.**

**Dedication:** The Laughing Fool.

**Disclaimer**: Oh good heavens, if only I owned it. Then I could fix certain things...

* * *

**Surprise!**

* * *

**Chapter Two:**

**Bad News Travels Fast (Because It's More Interesting)**

* * *

Shikamaru legitimately wondered if he should be there with Ino. The only thing that kept him there was the fact that he had felt Ino shaking before she'd even gotten to the point of speaking. She at least did him the favor of going into the kitchen where both of her parents were and leaving him in the living room where he wouldn't have to be within their line of vision.

"Hey Daddy, Mom," Ino said and Shikamaru could hear the tremor in her voice.

"Hey baby, it feels like I haven't seen you in quite awhile," Inoichi said, clearly in a good mood, moving closer and dropping a kiss on the top of Ino's head.

The guilt was radiating off Ino with such intensity.

"Um," Ino said nervously and she moved her hand to uncharacteristically fiddle with her hair.

"Yes?" Kayame said and she turned around to face Ino. She'd clearly caught on to something unusual in her tone.

"I, um, I'm pregnant."

All sound ceased.

"You-" Kayame began repeating faintly.

"_What?_" Inoichi cut her off abruptly. "You're _what_?"

"I'm pregnant," Ino said in a very small voice. "I'm almost three months along."

"Ino," Kayame said and there was such a deep reprimand in her tone that it made Shikamaru flinch.

"I'm sorry," Ino squeaked, "It was an accident."

Then Inoichi began speaking. "An accident," he repeated, "This was apparently a series of accidents. The first of which was believing that you were half-way ready enough to move out."

There was a painful silence.

"I'm so disappointed in you," Inoichi said. "I don't think that you realize what you've done. You really have no chance anymore of anything that I wanted for you. And now, here you are, eighteen, unmarried, unfinished in your career, and living in an apartment. I'm so disappointed."

"Ino," Kayame said and even her gentle tone was full of reproach, "We talked about these things. And ever since you were a little girl, there have been _plans_. Your father and I worked so _hard_ to make sure that you would have the opportunities-"

"And you've thrown them all away," Inoichi said flatly.

"I'm sorry," Ino repeated and her voice was incredibly faint.

"Not good enough," Inoichi said.

"I…I don't know what else to say," Ino whispered.

"I think," Inoichi said and his voice was hard, "that what is going to happen now, is that you are going to move back home where your mother and I can start trying to fix this mess that you've gotten into."

Shikamaru stopped breathing.

"Daddy…" Ino began and she sounded perilously close to tears.

"And if I see that boy anywhere _near_ you-"

"Daddy," Ino repeated, even closer to tears.

Kayame moved closer to Ino and started to pull her into a hug. "I know it's not what you want to hear, but maybe you _should_ move back for a little while…"

"I'm not moving back," Ino said and her voice was slightly muffled.

"Like hell you aren't," Inoichi said, "You're moving back today and-"

"I'm not moving back," Ino said, a bit louder. "I know you're disappointed, and I'm sorry. I'm not moving back."

"You're moving back here to live if I have to lock you in to keep you here," Inoichi said.

"I'm eighteen," Ino said faintly, "You can't do that."

"I'm your father. I can."

"These are my problems," Ino said, "I can deal with them. I'll fix it-"

"Fix it!" Inoichi said sharply, "This isn't like a failed test, or an injury on a mission, Ino! This is a _child_, a responsibility that can't be 'fixed!' You're so young and irresponsible and you're acting like a fool! I thought we raised you better than this-"

"Inoichi," Kayame said in a gentle voice, "Inoichi, calm down a little."

There was a terrible, barely restrained silence.

"Ino," Kayame continued, "I think that you need to leave for a little while."

"Oh no," Inoichi said, "She's not leaving this house-"

"Inoichi, I told you to calm down," Kayame said, gentle voice a bit sterner. "Ino, go home for tonight and we'll talk again once your father and I have had some time to discuss things."

"Alright," Ino choked.

"Just go home and try not to make things any worse," Inoichi said sharply.

Shikamaru had been slouching by the front door, waiting for Ino. She crossed through the living room with her head down and she walked right past him, continuing through the door and down the street at a quick pace, her shoulders held tensely and firmly in place. He followed lightly, a step behind, listening to her tightly controlled breathing, but not speaking. Frankly, he was surprised that he'd made it out of the Yamanaka home uninjured. It made him cringe a bit remembering how Inoichi had referred to him as, 'that boy.'

He'd known Inoichi for as long as he could remember. When he was a child he'd been told that Inoichi was a good friend and that if he ever needed anything at all… Well, that seemed to be done with.

When they reached their home, Ino opened the door, smoothly kicked off her shoes, and went directly into their bedroom. Shikamaru locked the front door, slipped off his shoes and followed her slowly. Ino stood just inside of the bedroom door, staring at the opposing wall with her hand pressed over her mouth. Shikamaru wordlessly pulled her into his arms and it took less than five seconds for her to start sobbing into his chest like a small child. He let her cry for over five minutes before lifting her up and moving them over to the bed where he continued to hold her and she gripped him tightly, her sobs far from subsiding.

"You told them," he said after awhile, "That was the worst of it."

"Wh-what if they make me go b-back?" she cried.

"You already told them that you wouldn't," he said soothingly, "They won't be able to."

Ino sobbed longer. "I disappointed them so much!" she continued crying.

There wasn't much that Shikamaru could say in response to that. He stroked her hair and they just stayed there for a long time. Even when she stopped actually crying she continued to shake and whimper. Ino had never truly disappointed her parents before in her life. She'd always been obedient, exceptionally intelligent, motivated, beautiful, and talented. She was usually beyond reprimand and even when she'd thrown fits or gone through phases of rebellion, she had _never_ done anything that they could truly be disappointed about.

Shikamaru waited patiently throughout all of it. This was the worst that it could get. But he'd known that it would be this bad and, quite frankly, he'd thought that it had actually gone well. He'd been ready for violence and not just against him. He'd been worried that Inoichi might have gotten angry enough to hit Ino in which he would have had to intervene (he knew that Ino would have done nothing to block), and the situation would have quickly disintegrated from there. Beyond that, he'd imagined Inoichi coming in to kill him. Which was still something to watch out for.

But he was completely certain that Ino's parents would forgive her. Especially once there was a little grandchild around, sure to be pretty enough to melt Inoichi's (shockingly) sensitive heart.

* * *

It was the evening before Shikamaru finally moved to get up. "Want me get Sakura to come stay with you?" he asked, pausing at the side of the bed.

"Yeah," Ino said in a voice that was no more than a whisper.

"I'll be back in awhile."

Sakura looked surprised to see him. "Hey, what's going on?" she said, glancing behind him, clearly looking for Ino.

"I need you to go hang out with Ino for awhile," he said, hands in his pockets. "It's been a bad day."

Sakura blinked at him. "What? Where are you going?"

"I've got to go talk to my parents," he said with a heavy sigh, "Otherwise I'd be staying there with her."

"What is going _on_ with you two?" Sakura exclaimed. "Ino was over here the other day acting like a psycho and now you're asking me to go _baby-sit_ her? Are you two breaking up or what?"

Shikamaru shifted his weight and looked up at her. "Ino's pregnant," he said bluntly.

Sakura blinked again and then her face completely transformed as a quick 'a-ha!' moment passed over it. "Holy shit, that totally explains it," she said. "Wow, she- wow!" Sakura suddenly gasped, "Her parents are going to _kill_ her-"

"Yeah, that's where we were earlier."

"How'd it go?" Sakura breathed.

"Pretty well, considering. Very badly, though. So would you mind going and keeping her company?"

"Yeah, of course!" Sakura said and then she gasped again, "And now you're going to tell _your_ parents?"

Shikamaru sighed, "I need to tell them before Ino's dad goes charging over to fight my father."

"Is it really that bad?" Sakura asked with wide eyes.

Shikamaru shrugged.

* * *

Shikaku figured it out as soon as Shikamaru said, "Hey," which was pretty impressive, even for Shikaku. Yoshino had been shocked and had immediately embarked on a tirade of what a stupid and irresponsible boy he was and how he had ruined Ino's life by trapping her. He'd waited through the outburst patiently. Ino wasn't trapped by any means. If she wanted to leave she'd have plenty of support and was more than an equal to the challenge. But the actual comfort came in knowing that she'd never do it. She didn't _want_ to leave him. Besides, as far as being irresponsible, personal life was the time to do that. Personal and paperwork. Those were the best places for ninjas to mess up.

Yoshino finally had to pause for breath and water. Shikaku asked Shikamaru how far along Ino was and despite his best efforts there was an unmistakable tone of anticipation and excitement. Yoshino rounded on him immediately, raging that he was the reason that their son was messing up so badly and what on earth could she do to try and keep either of them respectable when they were both such losers?

Said losers borne the verbal assault quite well and Yoshino eventually seemed appeased enough (for the moment). She walked away and into the kitchen and Shikaku waited until she was out of sight before speaking in an undertone to Shikamaru, "Did Ino already tell her parents?"

He nodded. "We went there this morning."

Shikaku winced. "How's Inoichi?"

"Very angry."

"Did he try to kill you?" Shikaku asked.

"Not yet."

"Be careful. Inoichi can be very… brutally violent and unthinking when it comes to… _issues_ like this."

Shikamaru nodded mechanically.

Shikaku paused. "Is Ino by herself?"

"Nah, Sakura's with her. I'm going to go home now. Have fun dealing with Mom."

Shikaku sighed. "You could have told me before you told her."

Shikamaru stopped to give him a look that conveyed _exactly_ how unconcerned he was with his father's comfort. Shikaku frowned in response, but let him go without saying anything.

* * *

"It won't be bad," Shikamaru could hear Sakura saying as he walked into the apartment, "it'll be a cute little baby."

Ino didn't respond. Sakura took another deep breath and continued, "And no matter how bad it is now, your dad is going to _love_ another cute little baby to have in his family. Think about how much he adored playing with and taking care of you!"

It was a nice effort on her part, but it really wasn't the right thing to say. "And I disappointed him in the end," Ino said in a wavering voice.

"This isn't the _end_," Sakura said, "everyone is going to be happy in the _end_. You'll see. It's just at a hard part right now."

Shikamaru could see what was left of Sakura cooking something. Sakura was a terrible cook, but Shikamaru was willing to try it. There hadn't really been any chance to eat anything that day, not that he found himself very hungry. He hoped that Sakura had gotten Ino to _drink_ something because she must have been dehydrated beyond reason with all of the crying that had been going on for the last few days.

He managed to choke down a bit of the what looked to be rice, but he couldn't really truly identify it (even after tasting it), and then he went into the bedroom. "How'd it go?" Ino immediately asked.

She looked like a mess, having clearly spent the last few hours crying. Again.

"Not bad," he said with a shrug.

"Is your mom mad at me?" Ino asked in a small voice.

"No. She feels bad for you and she's mad at me."

"She feels bad for me?" Ino repeated.

Sakura nodded wisely. "She's thinks that you're trapping Ino?" she said.

He nodded and flopped down on the bed. "Trapping me?" Ino said. "What the hell does that even mean?"

"That since I've got you pregnant, you won't be able to leave me," Shikamaru said.

"I could leave you," Ino said, "It'd be really easy."

Shikamaru rolled his eyes. Sakura stood up. "I've got to go. I was supposed to meet Lee an hour ago and he'll wait until I show up."

"Bye," Ino said miserably. "See ya," Shikamaru echoed. He laid back on the pillows and waited while Ino crawled over and laid her head on his chest. "I wish I were dead," she wailed.

"I don't," he said.

Ino sniffed. She was a sucker for him 'being sweet,' as she put it. He didn't do it often, so when he did the potency was even greater. "It'll get better," she said.

He nodded. "Yeah. My mom's already on your side. My dad is acting weird. And your parents will get over it. You know that your mom is working on your dad right now."

Ino shook at the very mention of her father. "He's going to kill you," she said, "and make me the equivalent of a widow."

"I'm pretty good at hiding," Shikamaru said, "and he'll eventually see that it'd be better not to kill me. Besides, he's going to end up talking to my dad first."

"Really?" Ino said.

"Yeah. He's going to go and blame my dad for being a loser and raising me badly and my dad will end up doing his best to get out of it. So, hopefully, he'll end up using most of his rage against my dad instead of me."

"You're kind of mean," Ino said, "Setting up your dad like that."

Shikamaru shrugged. "He raised me badly. He deserves it."

There was a moment of silence.

"You told Sakura that I was pregnant," Ino said, quietly accusatory.

"You _are_ pregnant," Shikamaru said.

"Sakura's a loud-mouth. She's going to tell everyone. So everyone will know by the end of the week," Ino said.

He shrugged. "You're a loudmouth too."

"Maybe I didn't want everyone to know yet!" Ino said.

"Everyone in this apartment already knows from all of that screaming that you did the other night," Shikamaru said, "and you're going to have to tell the missions office very soon so they won't send you on dangerous missions."

Ino groaned into his chest. "I won't be able to go on missions! It's going to be so boring!"

"You're joking," Shikamaru said, "Every time you get assigned a mission, you always complain about having to go."

"I _like_ going on missions. They are _interesting_."

Good, she was starting to feel better if she was complaining like that.

* * *

The next afternoon Kayame showed up at their apartment and told Shikamaru that she needed to speak to Ino alone. He glanced warily past her, vaguely wondering if this was some sort of trap Inoichi was using to get Shikamaru alone. "No, he's at home right now," Kayame said, watching Shikamaru's wandering gaze.

He'd made it barely a block from the apartment when a loud, "Hey!" stopped him.

Choji was across the street, pointing an accusing finger at him with a scowl on his face. Shikamaru waited while Choji quickly crossed the street and then stared at him. "Well," Choji said darkly, "Have you got something to tell me?"

"Why are you mad at me, Choji?" Shikamaru said tiredly.

"_I_ heard some crazy news from _Sakura_ that I figured I would have heard from _you_!" Choji said, his expression dark with betrayal.

"You've been listening to gossip from Sakura?" Shikamaru said.

Choji's expression faltered. "Is- is it just gossip then?" he asked.

"What'd you hear?"

"That there was going to be a little Nara running around sometime soon," Choji said.

That filled Shikamaru's head with an interesting visual. "Yeah, that's true," Shikamaru said reluctantly.

Choji sucked in a breath. "You irresponsible idiot!" he exclaimed and shoved Shikamaru with enough force to make him stumble. "Ino's dad is going to _kill_ you!"

Shikamaru glared at Choji, "Hey, how about you be a friend on this one?" he said, "I've got enough lectures."

Choji stopped short, his mouth open but frozen with the words that he was dying to throw at Shikamaru. Finally he shut his mouth and frowned. "You and I are going to go eat some barbeque. Now."

"No, I can't go to any familiar places," Shikamaru said, "We have to go somewhere that we don't usually go."

"Oh, you _told_ Ino's parents already?" Choji said incredulously and then he glanced around a bit nervously. "What the hell are you doing _out_?"

"Ino's mom is over and she needed me to leave."

"Are you sure that it's not just a trap?" Choji asked, grabbing Shikamaru's arm and dragging him down the street.

"Why the hell didn't you tell _me_ before you told Sakura?" Choji asked, hurt.

Shikamaru watched Choji pick up a kabob and rip through it quickly. He was eating in the fashion that very clearly meant that he was feeling emotional. "Sakura came over to stay with Ino for a little while. She needed to know."

"_I_ could have come over to stay with Ino," Choji said, reaching for another kabob.

"Ino was crying. You hate it when she cries. And you've told me before that you feel useless and don't know what to do when that happens."

"She was crying?" Choji said.

"It was not a pretty scene at her parents' house."

"Holy shit! You were _there_?" Choji gasped, "Are you suicidal?"

"_No._ But I couldn't let her go by herself. It was bad."

"Still. You could have told me at least before I _heard_ it from Sakura. I'd have rather heard it from you than from her."

"I didn't realize that she'd work _that_ fast," Shikamaru said, "This was only last night."

"Really?" Choji said in surprise, "Wow. I heard about it this morning."

Shikamaru sighed in exasperation. "She's telling _everyone_?"

"Well, she was telling Naruto. And I was there."

"Why was she telling Naruto?" Shikamaru said.

"Naruto loves gossip. And they're really close," Choji said.

Shikamaru cringed at the word 'gossip.' He was _not_ happy that his life was 'gossip.' "Who else was there? And what were you doing hanging out with Naruto?"

"I wasn't hanging out with Naruto, we were both just at the missions office."

"She was talking about it at the missions office?" Shikamaru asked alarmed.

Choji nodded. "Yeah. Her team was there getting an assignment. I was turning mine in."

"Her team?" Shikamaru said. "Who was at the desk?"

Choji cringed. "Anko," he said apologetically.

Anko. Who worked with Inoichi. Who was one of the most proficient gossips in all of Konoha. Son-of-a-bitch.

Shikamaru sighed. Well, hopefully things would be better when he went home that evening.

"My father is still mad," Ino said and Shikamaru was relieved to see that she wasn't crying. There was only so much that his nerves could take and they were quickly reaching that limit. "Mom said that you should be careful for at least another week," Ino said.

"You owe me for this," Shikamaru said, sprawling out on the couch.

"_I_ owe _you_ for this?" Ino said and there was a definite coolness to her tone. "I think you've got it backwards. _I'm_ the one that's going to have to get gross and big and uncomfortable while _you_ get to do whatever you want."

"You realize that your father and my mother are going to be furious with me until this is finished with?" Shikamaru returned, "And you're not even three months along. I've got to deal with this for over half of a year."

"So am I!"

"They aren't as angry at you as they are at me," Shikamaru said with a long-suffering sigh that was really more worthy of Ino. "And you're only going to be uncomfortable for three months of it at the most."

"_Two_ people are mad at you, Shikamaru," Ino said, "_Two_. And _everyone_ is going to be staring at me when I walk around, and they'll all be thinking 'Oh, what a screw-up.'"

Shikamaru felt an uncomfortable prick of guilt as he recalled exactly how many people already knew.

"And I'm not going to be able to have _any_ fun or go on _any _missions, or wear any new clothing that isn't all big and ugly," Ino ranted.

"Ino," Shikamaru said calmly. "You are _three months along_. You can still do whatever you want for the next couple of months."

"Not whatever I want," Ino said sulkily, "We have to spend the next week hiding you from Daddy."

Shikamaru felt his eye twitch. "I'm going to bed."

* * *

**A/N.**

Thanks, friends, Romans, and countrywomen and countrymen!

Review please~

-CR


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